Okay so I came here to vent, but the more I think about it and calm down I think I am totally overacting. But then again this is my blog and if I wanna be petty I can, right? I just had a really rough afternoon at work. Which is normal, except its not really. Most days I have problems with my supervisor and I am just plain used to that. I know thats how it is between us and I go about my business without giving her attitude in my face actions a second thought. Well today I had those same issues with someone that I thought was my friend. Ha! apparently not. (I didn't get that memo!) And why do I even care? GRRR! Why do I have to be the sensitive one???? I just wish that I didn't always let the things people say or do get under my skin and spoil a perfectly good afternoon!!!! Some days its hard to have a heart. Now don't get me wrong I am NOT perfect, nor is everyday with me sunshine, but hey I try, you know? (most days)
It makes me sit back and think, I guess I am just so frustrated with people in general. I feel like I pour my heart and emotions out for some people and all I get in return is trampled on. And I get it, or at least I thought I did. i mean I know that not everyone is gonna like me!! And you know what, they don't have to! I'm perfectly okay with that. I am just tired of trying so hard only to get so much attitude thrown in my face. But honestly I don't think thats even what bothers me. Its more when they know that I am trying to be nice and trying to get along and they seem to rub it right in my face that they don't care! Now I know all the old cliches, "no one ever said life was going to be easy", blah, blah, blah. But it is a whole 'nother story to live it out. And I know ya'll know what I am talking about cause these seemingly heartless people are everywhere.
Am I being ridiculous? Does it even matter what other people think? Who knows?!
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No, it does not matter what others think of us, but it does matter to us, as much as we have confidence in God, in ourselves, somewhere in our sensitive hearts, we want people to like us. And when we are sensitive loving people, we get trampled on. And at a daily job, it feels more like a daily hit by an 18 wheeler. Life is NOT easy, but it can be fun and entertaining. I believe in killing them with kindness, sooner or later it works, might be years down the road, but vengence is mine, sayeth the Lord. You just think about it all and put it into a scrap page. The album about what I don't like about people!
ReplyDeleteGlad Monday is over, whew.
Peace, Elaine
Yes it's your blog and you can vent all you want.. and yes these people are everywhere!
ReplyDeleteI hate that for you Jenn... and I could say it's their loss..because it truly is..but I know that doesn't make it easier for you. I believe in karma... it will come back to get them. I also believe that what you are having to deal with at work right now is to help prepare you for something else later in life.
When they turn around and aren't looking...stick your tounge out at them! It helps. Also praying out loud for God to help you not strike them in the face helps too!
Just know that you are a kind, sensitive, caring person and I for one am glad to know you!